Control the Inside to Control the Outside
Greed and Fear.
These are two human traits that need eliminated. Nearly every problem we have today is caused by human greed and fear of the unknown. Why aren't there prescriptions for that?
The challenge is control. People are so fixated on controlling things around them, that they do not stop to try and control things on the inside. Once we have control on the inside, it is much easier and much less stressful to control things on the outside.
I feel like this is a useless post because I don't think I can tell you how to achieve inner peace. The only thing I can tell you is how I've gotten as far as I have.
When I was young, my baseball coach asked my Dad to be the GM of my little league team. I got to pitch a lot. A huge part of pitching is keeping your composure on the mound. I started learning composure around twelve years old on the pitching mound. That same year at school, I was taking anger management classes, likely because I was a very emotional kid. Something my birth-mom passed onto me.
At football practice one day when I was younger and less in control of my emotions, I was getting picked on pretty bad. After practice I was crying about it in my garage. My brother of ten years my senior asked me why I was crying, rather, why I was letting them make me cry.
It dawned on me that I wasn't crying because I wanted to be crying. I was crying because the kids that picked on me had control of my emotions and therefore my actions. I wasn't about to let anyone have control of my actions but myself.
As a weird and awkward teenager, I had trouble with girls. My mother disowned me when I was five or so, and created a huge gap in my life. I tried desperately to fill the void with another girl.
It took me until my fourth year of college to understand emotional control, though I have still not stopped learning. I give this time in my life because it is when I stopped letting women control my emotions.
Shortly thereafter, I realized that not only had women controlling me, but my subconscious was controlling me with my emotions as well. A person I have named "Sam Gold" after the main character in the movie Revolver by Guy Ritchie.
My emotions and subconscious still control my actions occasionally, but everyday I realize that another one of my behaviors is caused by either emotional or subconscious influence. Upon realizing, I can determine whether or not this character trait is good or bad. From then on, I am able to slowly disable this automatic behavior.
With time, I will use inner peace to create and become my inner Tyler Durden.
So how do you control the outside from the inside? My first suggestion would be meditation. Each night before going to sleep, sit cross-legged in a quiet room. Close your eyes and concentrate on the rhythm of your breath. As thoughts enter your mind, gently push them out of your head and continue to focus on breathing.
It is slow going and for the first week or so, it will not appear that meditating helps, for the thoughts grow louder and beyond your control. Persistence and practice will silence the din of your mind. This is because your thoughts are like steam and meditating removes the lid on the boiling pot that is your mind. Once the initial pressure has been released, you will notice that your mind is easier to focus during the day.
The next thing you need to do is quit one of your bad habits. I picked cigarettes. You should pick eating and watching TV when bored to quit. Perhaps drinking or some other substance addiction. If you have more than one, just pick the one you dislike the most and quit. Exercise your will power.
After your bad habit is under control, replace it with a good habit. I replaced cigarettes with yoga every morning. Don't get me wrong, I hate exercising just as much as you, but exercise helps build your discipline and increases your will power.
Another thing you can do is learn something new. The less experienced you are with whatever you're learning the better. This will stimulate neural growth and plasticity in the brain. I picked guitar because I don't know anything about playing music. It's very challenging and incredibly frustrating, but the joy of doing something new is awesome!
Continue analyzing your life. Determine what actions or habits of yours have a negative impact on your life. Continue trading negative actions for positive ones. Don't worry about being selfish. If it turns out that there are negative people in your life, they need to go to.
As you begin to gain control of your actions, you will find that life is much easier to navigate while in a clear state of mind. Your inner Tyler Durden knows how to proceed towards your goals. The greater control you have over your actions, the better you will become at achieving your dreams.
03.11.2010. 19:20
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